...popping firecrackers...
...eating buffet style...
...enjoying family...
...shaking hands with celebrities...
...guarding the coconut pound cake...
Oh, what fun!
Tuesday, July 6, 2010
Friday, July 2, 2010
911...What's your emergency?
Ma'am, my closet floor is an inch deep in water!
Where are you located?
I am in a trailer house in the middle of nowhere.
I'm showing your location to be nowhere in the middle.
Yes, ma'am, that's correct.
What is your name?
Does it really matter? Just send somebody!
What seems to be the problem?
Danged water heater is busted!
That IS an emergency! We'll have someone out there right away! Is there anyone getting wet?
My feet are wet! And all my shoes are wet!
That's a huge problem! What brand of shoes do you wear?
Wal-Mart and Payless!
Oh, well, ma'am, we can't help you with that. Sorry. We don't consider wet Wal-Mart shoes worthy of an emergency.
Dang it! Then I called the plumber. He was out to our trailer house in the middle of nowhere in short order. Believe me, he knows the way!
Debbie, where did you get this water heater?
It's been so long ago, I don't remember, Steve.
We can't find one anywhere in this size.
What size is it?
Thirty-five gallons. And it runs on a 110 circuit. How does your family even take showers with this size heater?
We can only take two three-minute showers at a time. Anybody after that
gets a cold shower.
*swear word* I'll have to order one this size. It probably won't be here until Wednesday with the holiday weekend and all.
I'll give Rick a call. He's a genius.
So I dialed Rick's number. No answer. He's probably in the court house.
To you, does this look like a fun-filled July 4th weekend? With company coming, I think I'll rig up an outdoor shower. At least, it's hot enough. That will make memories, won't it.
Y'all have a great weekend. See you in the funny papers.
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